The One with the Refiner's Fire

Sending an 18 year old out into the world is very hard on a mom, for any reason. Sending a boy out to serve the Lord makes it a little easier in some ways (having the faith that they are taken care of), but in other ways (no phone calls, weekly e-mails only) makes it hard.
I am not going to sugar-coat it, Elder Brendan is struggling a little.
He doesn't open up much, so it was pretty significant this week when he admitted to me that he was not super happy, and missed us a lot. There is only so much that a mom can do via e-mail, and from a few thousand miles away.
I am not worried about him- I know he is determined, and just stubborn enough to push through this rough patch- but it still hurts my hearts to know that he is unhappy at the moment.

Every missionary hits what is referred to as "the refiner's fire."

1Peter1:7 That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ.

The training period, newness and excitement wears off and they are left with the reality that "this is my life now, for the next two years." He is right on schedule. It hits around the 4-5 month typically.
He could probably use some extra support and prayers, if you feel so inclined. (His pride is going to be angry at me for posting this!)

I think we all go through this "refiner's fire" at different stages in our lives.
I remember when I was knee-deep in diapers, Cheerios, and carpet stains with four littles, and periodically my mom would remind me that "these are the best years of your life!" and it made me a little want to kill myself, because IT HAD TO GET BETTER THAN THIS.
I know what she meant, the memories I get to keep now that I have passed that stage really are the best- but that particular "refiner's fire" was one of endurance.

I went through another "refiner's fire" a couple of years ago, when I went from a busy mom who was stretched a million ways with kids who needed me for everything, to a mom who was no longer needed at all. Suddenly I had free time to spare, and a quiet house. This "refiner's fire" was one of loneliness.

Each stage in our lives shapes us, and tries us. Each change that comes from moving to the next chapter is hard. Change requires us to assess ourselves and determine if we are going to adapt and grow, or resist and wither.

I don't have a lot of e-mail to post from Elder Brendan this week, since a good part of it was private. Brendan, if you read this- I am proud of you, and I think you've got this.
I mailed your guitar. Write a terrible country song about your situation, and get to work!
Here is his e-mail:

hey i dont really know what to talk about this week kinda sucked we had interviews with president which was good but this week kinda sucked also i got the Halloween package so that was cool i didnt take any pics this week sorry

I got a photo from his interview with the mission president and noticed that his hair looks suspiciously like it is fairly long and maybe even tucked behind his ears a little.

What are your plans today? Haircut? Lol

no haircut passed interviews so it'll be Christmas when i maybe cut it haha

You idiot. Lol

Remember when Jayden had long hair and Bishop Smith said "when he cuts his hair, you will know that he is ready for a mission, it is a sign of obedience and compliance." I want you to think about that for a minute

lol okay hey the fudge you mailed me was delicious by the way hey but i think im done emailing today so i love you and miss you 

I love you too. Good luck this week, I will pray for you.

Elder Wadley with the backpack. Terre Haute zone.

The One With Mike Pence and the Secret Service

This week I broke it to Elder Brendan that I sold the family pet turtles on a yard-sale site.
Listen, they started to get pretty stinky. I am not sure what the life expectancy is on domesticated red-eared sliders, but given my commitment to pets, they had outlived their welcome, so really it was their fault.
So here was my e-mail from Elder Brendan:

well im super upset because you sold the turtles

That was it.
I caught him online and got a little more out of him.

well this week was actually really cool we had an exchange i went with Elder Darrington to Brazil and we went on an adventure i found a dope sewing kit also the Griffin Bike Park opened this week its a member in our wards and vice president candidate Mike Pence was there also i shook hands with a member of the secret service so that was pretty cool oh and also i went to a Pentecostal church it was very interesting

I really like Mike Pence! That sounds pretty awesome! Did you take pictures? I hope he is our Vice President. He has some good values. What is the bike park? Like a skate park for bikes?

i dont know how to explain it but its like a ton of biking trails and stuff

Griffin Bike Park, Vigo County, Indiana

Looks like some fall color is coming to Indiana.

Governor Mike Pence at the Griffin Bike Park Opening. (Google borrowed image)

Elder Brendan takes some surprisingly scenic photos.

Another good one. But where is his face? Mama wants to see your dumb face.

I'm sending you a package tomorrow. Any requests?

That guitar?? and like some AAA, AA batteries

I sent him a photo of the package I was mailing.

that doesnt look like a guitar lol jk

The One With Dreadlocks and a Laundry Issue

Another week, another cryptic e-mail from Indiana.

so i didn't get transferred I am still here in Terre Haute so nothing has changed this week went really well we went on like a twoish day exchange with elder Darrington and elder Wallace it was really fun me and elder Darrington went and we probably walked around 10 miles that day it was a good time we also talked to this crazy black dude named Larry who tells us that god is a woman and Jesus and Moses were black his whole argument with Moses being black is somewhere it says that he cut off two of his locks and what are locks you may ask?? well they're dread locks no ifs, ands or buts about it that's the only thing that makes sense to him and he was to prideful to admit any different.

I think found the scripture that I think this convo is loosely referencing:
Numbers 6:5
 All the days of the vow of his separation there shall no razor come upon his head: until the days be fulfilled, in the which he separateth himself unto the Lord, he shall be holy, and shall let the locks of the hair of his head grow.

That was all I could find. 
Elder Brendan sent me some super covert (fingers over the lens) video files of this Larry, and I have to say, he really might be short a can or two.
 I also got this:

i may or may not have turned my clothes a little bit blue 

How did that happen? Your white stuff? Have you tried soaking them in oxy clean?

no i havent tried that there not that blue so dont worry about it

Well, okay then.
Here are his photos from this week:

"pirate themed district meeting"

"Elder Darrington and a dead dove."

Terre Haute, Indiana

I have to say, Indiana has some beautiful sunsets. I am hopeful that Elder Brendan appreciates sunsets. I pray every day for my boys to be aware. Be aware of opportunities for service, and just generally pay attention to what is going on around them.
Sunsets count, right? Like if he is noticing the beauty of a sunset, he is noticing other things too?
Like maybe a pair of jeans in with the whites?
Ugh.

The One With Foster Kids and a Baptism

This week I got an actual e-mail from Elder Brendan. And some photos with his face in them! I also made a new Facebook friend. The farm that the Elders and Sisters go to on p-days is called "Foster Farms." I am now friends with Klisse Foster, the sweet member who puts up with all of the animals, both human and otherwise. My heart is always so full when I see other mamas feeding and loving my boys. This is not Klisse's first rodeo. She writes a newsletter about what is happening on the farm, and takes pictures of the missionaries- she refers to them all as her "Foster Kids." I love that. I hit the missionary mom jackpot with Klisse! She spoils them quite thoroughly with made-from-scratch home cooking. We should've sent Brendan with elastic-waisted maternity pants.
She sent me this last week:

"Wadley is playing with an erector set and when Darrington wanted to play, he got his hands slapped, so Darrington got the K'nex set with the motors."

That sounds about right.
Here is Elder Brendan's e-mail this week:

hey this week has been really good!! conference was pretty good we did have a baptism this week her name is XXXX she is super cool! i had to give the talk it was pretty bad also we sung amazing grace so that was fun but yeah i don't really know this week has been a lot of prep for the baptism oh i went to the temple this week it was really cool

Indianapolis, Indiana LDS Temple

Our ward mission leader took us and hes really funny we were in the telestial room which is super pretty just btw and he leans over to me and in the loudest whisper ever he says " guess how many geese are on the wall" everyone turned and looked at us it was really funny but idk what else to talk about so i have some pics

Elder Eschler, XXXX and her husband, Elder Wadley

Eschler and i were tracting and no one had answered so he sat down and gave up haha and the shriners circus is in town so they had elephants but nothing else was set up at the time so literally all we saw were these two random elephants just chillen in this field it was really funny

the skull i got from an investigator he made it while he was in prison the circle thing thats the gate doors to the temple- it is Indiana's state flower its super sick

A couple of e-mails ago Elder Brendan talked about some investigator asking his companion to "unhook his echo." I forgot to ask him what in the crap that meant, and I remembered this time so here was that riveting and really strange conversation:

What was the deal with the guy that wanted Eschler to turn off his echo?

oh thats XXXXX hes an investigator he is really interesting but eschler said he couldnt turn it off so XXXX said he'd ask his pastor haha but hes just a typical person in Indiana: crazy

 What is an echo?

an echo? when you yell and you can hear your voice back at you

What the heck? He wanted him to unhook his echo? How did he want him to do that?

mom i dont know the really question should be how did you not know what an echo was

I thought it was maybe a car thing like a governor

its cool dont worry about it